Thursday, September 8, 2011

Thankless Motherhood: Cathedral Construction

Labor Day weekend with Squire and Lincoln was just what I needed. Squire didn't have any required meetings to attend on Friday, so he decided to stay home to study. We had all weekend together, all Monday (including a delicious BBQ at a friend's home), and then yesterday he even didn't have any mandatory meetings to attend until 5:45pm, so he decided to stay home to study yet again. Between eating three square beautiful meals, having some face-to-face adult conversation, and getting out of changing a few of Lincoln's diapers I felt like I was in heaven!  

I'm so proud of Squire and all he is accomplishing in medical school for our family. He studies 12-13 hours a day (did great on his first exam p.s.), and after his long days arduous days he still comes home to me smiling and willing to help out however he can. Here is a picture of him in student doctor action, practicing his poking skills on a friend:
First time poking veins with needles - but it won't be the last!
Though I am grateful for my predicament (having a handsome husband in medical school and an adorable little son to boot), I have to admit that these last few months have been particularly difficult for me. Stay-at-home motherhood is often lonely work. And hearing about all the interesting new things Squire's learning each day make me miss the grad school that won't be coming for me for probably another 20 years. The glazed over looks I get from people at some of the school functions when I say, "I'm a stay-at-home mom," haven't made the transition any easier to stomach either. At the infamous cocktail party we attended a few weeks ago, one woman even offered me a job as a realtor, as though to suggest that I was not doing anything with my time already, or maybe to "save" me from my current situation?

There are probably always lots of posts about this topic and in my new mother state I'm simply more aware of them than I was before. But I have to say I've noticed several posts specifically on the difficulties of motherhood in the last week or so. Here are two of my most recent favorites: one on how women lose a part of themselves when they become a mother, and another that depicts finding balance in day-to-day new motherhood.  In any case, they've all been striking a chord with me lately, because if there is anything I've learned in my short time as a mother - it's that motherhood is hard, and it is thankless work.

However. . .

Despite the difficulty and thanklessness of the work I do each day, I still feel strongly in my heart that this total devotion of my time and self to my son is right for this season of my life. And, that God is pleased with me for making the sacrifice to give to my little family the best part of my energy and heart each day - even when that lady at the cocktail party doesn't understand why I do what I do. Even, when I question it myself in moments of weakness. I read something shared by a friend on facebook this morning that only reminded me of that truth again: The Invisible Mother.

I thought I would pass it along in case any of you other mothers are struggling with your station in life too. Because, whether anyone else notices the "invisible" sacrifices we make, it's always nice to remember that God does - oh yeah, and that those sacrifices? They matter. A lot. We're building cathedrals, mamas. We're building cathedrals.

Inside Cathedral de Barcelona
Image Credit: Serge Melki on flikr


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