Monday, June 20, 2011

Anything Your Dad Does, Mine Can Do Better!

Squire: What's one of your favorite childhood memories of your dad?

Jami: Oh, I loved when I was a really little girl - maybe 6 years old. He brought me on a "daddy-daughter" date to a baseball game. I don't even remember which teams were playing, but it was exciting and loud. He bought me a hot dog and soda, and a giant foam hand to wave. He made me feel so special.

Squire: That sounds nice, but did your dad teach you how to fish? No! MY dad taught me how to fish, and I taught you how to fish.

Jami: Well, MY dad knows pretty much everything about every coin there is. He could sell a penny for $50. And I know he's taught you a thing or two about numismatics! So don't even go there!

Squire: Well, MY dad can fix everything with a motor in it. And, he's saved us hundreds of dollars on our cars! So there! Let this be the end of it. My dad's better!

Jami: I'm not giving up that easily. MY dad - knows a thing or two about cars, too. You should see the old mustangs he fixes up, sells, and drives 200 MPH within the prescribed speed limits. He's got trophies galore.

Squire: Well, that's all well and good but has your dad ever built a car from scratch? I don't think so. OK, so it was made out of wood. But we had lots of fun in that car, drivin' up and down the street like a hot rod!

Jami: I'm pretty sure my dad has made a car from scratch. Even if he hasn't, I know he could. Has your dad ever built a house from scratch? Because my dad knows how to build a house from bottom to top AND how to make it beautiful inside to boot. Remember how beautiful my parent's backyard looked for our wedding reception? Yeah, my dad pretty much threw that together in a couple months.

Squire: Yeah, yeah. That's pretty nice. But MY dad could live in the wilderness with no house. And for food, he would lasso a deer, a coyote, or a rabbit and then kill it with an arrowhead he made himself!  And then, he would cook it with a fire that he built from his mustache hairs - all of which he has done! OK maybe that's just a legend, but I'm pretty sure it happened.

Jami: My dad doesn't need to go out in to the wilderness to catch a rabbit for dinner. He's got plenty in his own backyard AND a clever cage he made to catch them with. Much less messy than the arrowhead approach. Besides, when your dad was out building fires with his mustache, my dad was advising Al Gore when he invented the internet! His website is top-searched on google, his Ebay ads are shiny, his scratch websites and blog posts are top-notch. He even has his own facebook page - and he uses it!!

Squire: That was a low blow, Jami. And that would be painful - except that MY dad has a facebook too! And his profile picture is way cooler than your dad's! Jami it appears you're much too biased to look at this unbiasedly. So perhaps we'll just have to call it a draw.

Jami: Maybe you're right. I don't really see us coming to an agreement anytime soon. And really, they are both our dads now anyway . . . we're pretty lucky - don't ya think?

Happy Father's Day, Dads! We love you - both! :)

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